I’ve found the definition of masochism: a Peace Corps volunteer who’s had a carrot for breakfast, sitting down between classes to reformat an Applebee’s menu she downloaded from the internet. Naturally, it’s for class usage and thus serves some purpose, but never have I ever in my entire life wished that there were more Applebee’s in the world. Until today.
Warning: the next section should not be read by other volunteers.
Since I’ve got the menu right here, how about a sampling of the prime offenders? Mmm… sampler…
Nachos Nuevos Crispy red, blue & yellow corn chips topped with spicy ground beef, black beans & melted cheese. Topped with sour cream, fresh tomato & jalapeсo 11.49
Fried Chicken Salad Bite size chicken fingers atop mixed greens with cheddar, diced tomatoes & eggs. Served with honey mustard dressing & toasted garlic bread 11.29
Honey Grilled Salmon Flame grilled Atlantic salmon glazed with Applebee's honey pepper sauce & served with almond rice pilaf, seasonal vegetables & garlic toast. Served grilled as well - without the honey sauce 17.49
Bacon Cheese Chicken Grill Sandwich An 8 oz. boneless marinated chicken breast grilled with bacon & cheddar cheese. Served on a toasted sesame seed bun 11.49
So that’s my hell for today. The funny thing is that I considered Applebee’s to be quite the mediocre establishment before I left. Maybe it’s because they were everywhere, or because despite their claims to be part of the neighborhood, they all looked the same inside, save for different local school colors. Is that really what I miss about America? Consumerism? Assembly-line production? Pandering, middle-of-the-road options disguised as innovation?
YES.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
No comments:
Post a Comment