Premature Imagination

I'm wondering now if maybe the turn of spring has made me a little too excited for July 17th, and if perhaps I need to tone down my looking-forward quotient in order to make it through the remainder of the school year. Granted, what remains of the school year is not much-- especially when one takes into consideration that after I get back from COS conference in mid-May, the kids will probably have stopped attending-- but still, maybe it's time to go one week at a time.

Why do I think this? Well, this morning I was loathe to go to school. This level of loathe doesn't happen often, and I think it's because it's cloudy today, which is no excuse but is still a relevant factor. I arrived at school to find the English cabinet room locked, which was a bad sign because my counterpart has the lesson before me on Mondays. Turns out that my counterpart's mother had a medical emergency, and my counterpart couldn't come that day. Just then, my 8th form filed in, the most out-of-control class with or without the presence of my counterpart, but especially so without. Praise the Lord, the assistant director believed me this time when I said I wasn't qualified or permitted to teach alone (first time in 2 years she's listened to me! progress!), and the kids were shuffled off to the French teacher. I called my counterpart, who instructed me to ask the director to do the same for the other two upcoming lessons.

Me: So Tsira wanted me to ask you to put the classes together, the 6th and the 9th form, with their parallel classes.
Director: Then you'll teach them both?
Me: I can't teach alone. Tsira will be back tomorrow.
Director: But she won't be back today.
Me: I don't have permission to teach alone.
Director: I know that's the rule, but... you won't be teaching the lessons today?
Me: No.

Despite my concrete knowledge that I was only brought to the 3rd school to write grants-- and this is not hearsay or rumormongering, this is what I was told by the school-- I still felt a little guilty. Was I exercising my legitimate right to stick to the parameters of my Peace Corps program, or was I skipping out because I didn't feel like teaching? In either case, I doubt very much that my counterpart will be there tomorrow, so I'll probably end up teaching by myself anyway and balancing the karma. Or was the karma balanced when I taught by myself for two straight weeks in December? In any case, it reminded me that there is a lot more school left, and perhaps it would be good to focus.

*******

Note from the next day: I am psychic. I did end up teaching alone today, just in time for an encore performance from the 8th form, so I've done my penance for my laziness and/or attention to rules. I confiscated two cell phones, slapped one desk with my notebook, and dragged one child by the arm to another desk. All the while, work/slave songs were playing in my head; they really do keep you going... "He picked up a hammer and a little piece of steel, said this hammer's gonna be the death of me, lawd, lawd, this hammer's gonna be the death of me."

I also started having heart palpitations. Coincidence?